Top 10 Tim Vine Quotes

Most Famous Top 10 Tim Vine Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best top 10 tim-vine quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Tim Vine Quotes Collection on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Last Updated on May 30, 2021

Me
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Nov 07, 2020

You know, somebody actually complimented me on my driving today. They left a little note on the windscreen, it said 'Parking Fine.' So that was nice.

Never
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Nov 07, 2020

I've just been on a once-in-a-lifetime holiday. I'll tell you what, never again.

Family
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Nov 07, 2020

Apparently, one in five people in the world are Chinese. And there are five people in my family, so it must be one of them. It's either my mum or my dad. Or my older brother, Colin. Or my younger brother, Ho-Chan-Chu. But I think it's Colin.

Car
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Nov 07, 2020

So I was getting into my car, and this bloke says to me 'Can you give me a lift?' I said 'Sure, you look great, the world's your oyster, go for it.'

Go
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Nov 07, 2020

Now, most dentist's chairs go up and down, don't they? The one I was in went back and forwards. I thought 'This is unusual'. And the dentist said to me 'Mr Vine, get out of the filing cabinet.

Nov 07, 2020

So I got home, and the phone was ringing. I picked it up, and said 'Who's speaking please?' And a voice said 'You are.'

Nov 07, 2020

So I rang up my local swimming baths. I said 'Is that the local swimming baths?' He said 'It depends where you're calling from.'

Nov 07, 2020

So I rang up a local building firm, I said 'I want a skip outside my house.' He said 'I'm not stopping you.'

Down
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Nov 07, 2020

I was reading a book... 'the history of glue' - I couldn't put it down.

Now
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Nov 07, 2020

Now you know those trick candles that you blow out and a couple of seconds.

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