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Steve Allen Quotes

Most Famous Steve Allen Quotes of All Time!

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Last Updated on May 30, 2021

Comedy
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Nov 07, 2020

Many comedians and comedy writers have shared the childhood experience of learning to joke to protect themselves from neighborhood bullies when challenge or physical defense were not among the sensible options.

Love
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Nov 07, 2020

Do I ever get questions that are rude or impertinent? Yes, but I love to use them. The audience immediately perceives the emotional awkwardness of the situation.

Nov 07, 2020

I was in sixth grade the first time I was required to speak in front of an audience. I had terrible stage fright and felt quite ill, in fact, by the time I had to give my little talk to students in another class across the hall.

Humor
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Nov 07, 2020

If we do not know what humor is, that may be because we do not know what humankind is.

Humor
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Nov 07, 2020

We will take almost any kind of criticism except the observation that we have no sense of humor.

Experience
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Nov 07, 2020

Much of the best humor is found in the frequently tragic reality of human experience.

Me
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Nov 07, 2020

Asthma doesn't seem to bother me any more unless I'm around cigars or dogs. The thing that would bother me most would be a dog smoking a cigar.

Hair
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Nov 07, 2020

The hair is real - it's the head that's a fake.

Humor
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Nov 07, 2020

Humor is a social lubricant that helps us get over some of the bad spots.

Government
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Nov 07, 2020

Ours is a government of checks and balances. The Mafia and crooked businessmen make out checks, and the politicians and other compromised officials improve their bank balances.

Nov 07, 2020

Totalitarianism is patriotism institutionalized.

Nov 07, 2020

In a rational society we would want our presidents to be teachers. In our actual society we insist they be cheerleaders.

God
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Nov 07, 2020

If there is a God, the phrase that must disgust him is - holy war.

People
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Nov 07, 2020

If the Old Testament were a reliable guide in the matter of capital punishment, half the people in the United States would have to be killed tomorrow.

Energy
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Nov 07, 2020

Dark energy is perhaps the biggest mystery in physics.

Lost
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Nov 07, 2020

I used to be a heavy gambler. But now I just make mental bets. That's how I lost my mind.

Nice
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Nov 07, 2020

One of the nice things about problems is that a good many of them do not exist except in our imaginations.

Funny
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Nov 07, 2020

I personally find it difficult to accept that there could be anyone on earth insensitive to the comic abilities of Laurel and Hardy, Sid Caesar, Woody Allen, Mel Brooks, or Martin Short. But no matter who the comic entertainer is, there is always at least a minority prepared to say, 'What's all the excitement about? He doesn't seem funny to me.'

Children
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Nov 07, 2020

In those of us who have the mysterious ability to amuse others, it is usually the case that even before we were aware of our own abilities, we had become practiced at laughing more than other children in our social circle.

More
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Nov 07, 2020

It often seems that, for whatever strange reasons, comedians, in addition to their formal performances, have more comic experiences in real life than other people do.

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