Don Rickles Quotes

Most Famous Don Rickles Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best don-rickles quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Don Rickles Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Last Updated on May 30, 2021

Empire State
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Nov 07, 2020

Eddie Fisher married to Elizabeth Taylor is like me trying to wash the Empire State Building with a bar of soap.

Kiss
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Nov 07, 2020

When you enter a room, you have to kiss his ring. I don't mind, but he has it in his back pocket.

Funny
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Nov 07, 2020

Who picks your clothes - Stevie Wonder?

Great
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Nov 07, 2020

The old days were the old days. And they were great days. But now is now.

Looking
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Nov 07, 2020

I never went out looking for glory.

Head
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Nov 07, 2020

My whole act is off the top of my head.

Nov 07, 2020

When you stand alone and sell yourself, you can't please everyone. But when you're different, you can last.

Humor
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Nov 07, 2020

You can't study comedy; it's within you. It's a personality. My humor is an attitude.

End Of The Tunnel
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Nov 07, 2020

Struggling is hard because you never know what's at the end of the tunnel.

Never
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Nov 07, 2020

Political correctness? In my humor, I never talk about politics. I was never much into all that.

Know
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Nov 07, 2020

I have no idea what I'm going to say when I stand up to give a toast. But I do know that anything I say I find funny.

Know
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Nov 07, 2020

Everything I've ever done in my whole career, people might not know, I've never written anything down on paper.

Life
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Nov 07, 2020

Show business is my life. When I was a kid I sold insurance, but nobody laughed.

Phones
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Nov 07, 2020

Smartphones. Who cares? Smartphones. I only have dummy phones.

First
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Nov 07, 2020

To my knowledge, I was the first guy really to do what I do. And then later on different comedians started trying doing it.

Always
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Nov 07, 2020

Well, I call myself an actor. I always wanted to be one.

Onstage
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Nov 07, 2020

When I'm onstage, I'm acting.

Funny
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Nov 07, 2020

You know what's funny to me? Attitude.

My Own
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Nov 07, 2020

I have my own gym. When you do jokes and they sell, you get a gym.

Mother
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Nov 07, 2020

I was a mother's boy.

Hurt
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Nov 07, 2020

They always use the word 'insult' with me, but I don't hurt anybody. I wouldn't be sitting here if I did. I make fun of everybody and exaggerate all our insecurities.

Nov 07, 2020

I'm very shy so I became very outgoing to protect my shyness.

People
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Nov 07, 2020

Some people say funny things, but I say things funny.

Punch
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Nov 07, 2020

You throw your best punch, otherwise don't do it.

Fun
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Nov 07, 2020

I do situations and make fun of authority and life.

Like
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Nov 07, 2020

In our day we went from - we went into saloons. We couldn't cross over like you can today, get a television series and all of a sudden you're a major movie star, you know.

Nov 07, 2020

I mean, in my - and I'm not trying to do spilled milk, but in those days it was a little - I think it was much tougher, because you got an image, and you were in a saloon. And it was tough to come out of a saloon and to get in films, and to maintain an image, you know.

Nov 07, 2020

I told jokes badly.

Joke
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Nov 07, 2020

I cannot tell a joke. But I can do a situation, that it becomes a joke.

Life
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Nov 07, 2020

To me, the stand up part in my life is great. I know I can do that. When I get an acting chance, I'm really thrilled.

Great
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Nov 07, 2020

It takes many years to be a great comedian.

Light
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Nov 07, 2020

I have a problem, if the light goes on on TV and it blinks midnight, I don't know how to fix it.

Nov 07, 2020

Funny is funny.

Everything
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Nov 07, 2020

I still have drive, but everything is relative.

Big
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Nov 07, 2020

I have to have energy because I have a lot of expenses. A couple of cars, couple of dogs and a big estate.

Nov 07, 2020

I think if I took therapy, the doctor would quit. He'd just pick up the couch and walk out of the room.

Book
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Nov 07, 2020

I was sitting in the toilet and I was by myself. I was tired of playing with the roller, so I said I'd better write a book.

Lose
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Nov 07, 2020

You lose your energy, you lose that excitement and it gets the audience up.

People
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Nov 07, 2020

I'd like to think my performance is today. I never try to - it's so, as you know, watching me, I have a beginning, middle and ending. But every night the show changes and I relate to an audience and I relate to the young people.

Fun
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Nov 07, 2020

I was always the guy - out of insecurities, I was always making fun, even as a kid.

Life
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Nov 07, 2020

When I got out of high school, I wanted to be an actor but was getting a lot of rejections. I was getting rejected by life. My mother, God rest her soul, told me not to quit.

Good
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Nov 07, 2020

My father was an insurance man and a small-time gambler. He was a good man, but he had an eye for the racehorses, and I saw how it used to bother my mother. I've never gambled a dime. Never, in all those years in Vegas.

People
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Nov 07, 2020

I always say, when you're onstage you can't please everybody. I'm sure there are people who may not take to what I do, but that's okay. Thank God the majority are in my corner.

Always
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Nov 07, 2020

I call myself an actor. I always wanted to be one.

Great
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Nov 07, 2020

My wife, Barbara, is great. She arranges when I do work that I have a day off between performances.

My Own
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Nov 07, 2020

I write my own tweets.

Me
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Nov 07, 2020

If something strikes me as funny, I'll put it in my performance.

Most
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Nov 07, 2020

I've been to Philadelphia a lot of times over the years, playing the old Celebrity Room and most of the other clubs around there that don't exist anymore.

Sinatra
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Nov 07, 2020

Sinatra was somebody special.

Nice
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Nov 07, 2020

Asians are nice people, but they burn a lot of shirts.

Men
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Nov 07, 2020

If I have learned anything, it is to keep my wife happy by sending her lavish gifts. Other men can learn from my success and send their wives and girlfriends fresh flowers for birthdays, anniversaries, and of course, Valentine's Day.

Day
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Nov 07, 2020

To this day, when I say that I went to the American Academy, people are very impressed. The reputation of the school has always been fantastic.

Nov 07, 2020

Compared to what some of the young comics use for material today, I'm a priest.

Being
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Nov 07, 2020

In the 45 years I've worked in casinos, I dreamed of being honored by an organization like the American Gaming Association, especially since I don't even have a hunting license.

Day
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Nov 07, 2020

I ride a recumbent bike for half an hour every day.

Never
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Nov 07, 2020

I've never had a written script.

Fun
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Nov 07, 2020

Yeah, I make fun of blacks, and why not? I'm not a black.

Father
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Nov 07, 2020

I was 28 when my father died, and I was an only child.

Life
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Nov 07, 2020

My wife came into my life, and my mother still wanted to be the boss.

Nov 07, 2020

I'm not one of those guys who wants to die on a stage.

Nov 07, 2020

Italians are fantastic people, really. They can work you over in an alley while singing an opera.

Nov 07, 2020

I want to be a dog, but I'm a pussycat.

Person
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Nov 07, 2020

The average person pushes an elevator button 6 or 7 minutes before realizing it's not working. I did a study on this, you know.

Johnny
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Nov 07, 2020

The man I adored, and miss him terribly, was Johnny Carson.

Good
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Nov 07, 2020

I have a wonderful road manager, and he travels with me. And my valet and friend travels with me. My little entourage is great, and they take good care of me.

New
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Nov 07, 2020

When you first start out with something new, you're always a little uptight.

Best Friend
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Nov 07, 2020

Bob Newhart, who is my best friend, is one of the guys I adore.

Got
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Nov 07, 2020

You've got to be able to sell yourself.

Get Married
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Nov 07, 2020

I didn't get married until I was 38.

High School
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Nov 07, 2020

Even when I was in high school and the Navy, I was the guy who could rip somebody, and they'd laugh at it.

Kiss
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Nov 07, 2020

I was nice to the people in the Philippines for the two and a half years I was there, because I knew eventually I'd have to kiss up to them so my grandchildren could have toys.

Morning
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Nov 07, 2020

I stopped smoking. But my personality I still have. I get up in the morning, and not everybody loves me, so if you want to call that a bad habit, there's that.

Nov 07, 2020

No matter where you go in this world, you will always find a Jew sitting in the beach chair next to you.

Me
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Nov 07, 2020

Famous people are deceptive. Deep down, they're just regular people. Like Larry King. We've been friends for forty years. He's one of the few guys I know who's really famous. One minute he's talking to the president on his cell phone, and then the next minute he's saying to me, 'Do you think we ought to give the waiter another dollar?'

Nov 07, 2020

Room service is great if you want to pay $500 for a club sandwich.

Care
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Nov 07, 2020

I don't care if the average guy on the street really knows what I'm like, as long as he knows I'm not really a mean, vicious guy. My friends and family know what I'm really like. That's what's important.

Me
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Nov 07, 2020

After I graduated, I tried Broadway, which was difficult for me. It was tough to get a part on Broadway, so I just started talking to audiences at different social gatherings, and little by little I became Don Rickles - whatever that is.

Guys, we are trying to share Unique Don Rickles Quotes, so you will not get to read the same things again and again on our website. You can also share your favorites on Facebook or send them to a friend who loves to reading quotes.

Don Rickles Quotes

Most Famous Don Rickles Quotes of All Time!

We have created a collection of some of the best don-rickles quotes so you can read and share anytime with your friends and family. Share our Top 10 Don Rickles Quotes on Facebook, Twitter, and Pinterest.

Guys, we are trying to share Unique Don Rickles Quotes, so you will not get to read the same things again and again on our website. You can also share your favorites on Facebook or send them to a friend who loves to reading quotes.

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